The toughest thing faced so far as a nurse
It's been awhile since I've posted on here. Not really for any particular reason. Mostly, I've just been busy and free time has been spent doing other things. My bad ya'll.
I've been a bedside RN for a little over 3 years and have grown to love my job. Ever since I went to counseling I tend to probably OVER analyze or am over grateful for the things in my life. I am not saying thats a bad thing, I have become extremely aware of my emotions and reactions to things and also why people react to things as well. Okay, I am definitely getting off topic.
Last weekend I was working my normal weekend, day shifts. I got particularly close with two families because their loved ones needed some extra cares and I'm not sure I just bonded with them. Anyway, I took over the care of this other patient on Sunday, I had seen this patient and the family throughout the Friday and Saturday due to just being down that hall and what not. I also helped with her a few times. I had her for the full 12 hour shift and she was a delight, mostly just waiting for a facility to accept her to discharge to. This is often common on the weekends.
Less than an hour earlier I had been in her room talking with her, she was saying how I "think of everything and am prepared", and had given some meds. And then maybe 20 minutes after my the nursing assistant was in there talking with her.
Now due to privacy laws and such I won't go into details but ultimately her heart monitor started alarming and another nurse and myself ran in there. And her wishes were to not have any interventions (that we could have provided at that time). She passed away with out pain and the other nurse and I were in the room with her, she was not alone. I mean this wasn't necessarily expected, I had just talked with her and we had been joking around.
Multiple health providers had been trying to get ahold of family. We knew the husband would be coming in and I personally was just trying to keep it together. The last thing I wanted to happen was for him to walk into the room without someone talking to him. I was watching that room like a hawk with my anxiety running high.
The husband ended up coming up prior to anyone getting ahold of him. Security had actually brought him up by wheelchair. I had to tell him in the hallway right then and there, that his beloved wife had passed away. He was so excited to see her. That was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. I went into the room with him and sat with him and listened to him tell me stories. He was extremely strong and had a strong faith that this is what she was ready. But I will forever remember this moment.
As a nurse, you tend to think, meh, it's just part of the job (for many aspects of it). But when you are there for someones last breath or have to tell their husband that they passed away, you are reminded about how challenging this job can truly be. We do this job because we love it. We don't do it because it's easy, because it's not an easy career.
I clocked out and saw the son as I was headed back to the room to sit with the husband because I didn't want him to be alone. The son was bawling, and as someone who can relate because I have lost a parent, it's just an emptying feeling of remorse.
I went home exhausted from the emotions, I slept like absolute crap because of the shock and the processes I had to go through to deal with it after I got through it for the family. For some reason, being there and witnessing it, having to tell the family, etc., was extremely hard on me. However, I do know that personally I needed to process all of that to be okay and reflect on all the emotions I felt with it.
I will always be proud to be a nurse, and I am even grateful that it happened to me and I was the one that had to handle it and was able to be there for the family. I do not think I could be more proud to be a nurse and I hope I never forget that what we experience and go through is not completely normal to the non medical professionals.
xoxo breezy
I've been a bedside RN for a little over 3 years and have grown to love my job. Ever since I went to counseling I tend to probably OVER analyze or am over grateful for the things in my life. I am not saying thats a bad thing, I have become extremely aware of my emotions and reactions to things and also why people react to things as well. Okay, I am definitely getting off topic.
Last weekend I was working my normal weekend, day shifts. I got particularly close with two families because their loved ones needed some extra cares and I'm not sure I just bonded with them. Anyway, I took over the care of this other patient on Sunday, I had seen this patient and the family throughout the Friday and Saturday due to just being down that hall and what not. I also helped with her a few times. I had her for the full 12 hour shift and she was a delight, mostly just waiting for a facility to accept her to discharge to. This is often common on the weekends.
Less than an hour earlier I had been in her room talking with her, she was saying how I "think of everything and am prepared", and had given some meds. And then maybe 20 minutes after my the nursing assistant was in there talking with her.
Now due to privacy laws and such I won't go into details but ultimately her heart monitor started alarming and another nurse and myself ran in there. And her wishes were to not have any interventions (that we could have provided at that time). She passed away with out pain and the other nurse and I were in the room with her, she was not alone. I mean this wasn't necessarily expected, I had just talked with her and we had been joking around.
Multiple health providers had been trying to get ahold of family. We knew the husband would be coming in and I personally was just trying to keep it together. The last thing I wanted to happen was for him to walk into the room without someone talking to him. I was watching that room like a hawk with my anxiety running high.
The husband ended up coming up prior to anyone getting ahold of him. Security had actually brought him up by wheelchair. I had to tell him in the hallway right then and there, that his beloved wife had passed away. He was so excited to see her. That was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. I went into the room with him and sat with him and listened to him tell me stories. He was extremely strong and had a strong faith that this is what she was ready. But I will forever remember this moment.
As a nurse, you tend to think, meh, it's just part of the job (for many aspects of it). But when you are there for someones last breath or have to tell their husband that they passed away, you are reminded about how challenging this job can truly be. We do this job because we love it. We don't do it because it's easy, because it's not an easy career.
I clocked out and saw the son as I was headed back to the room to sit with the husband because I didn't want him to be alone. The son was bawling, and as someone who can relate because I have lost a parent, it's just an emptying feeling of remorse.
I went home exhausted from the emotions, I slept like absolute crap because of the shock and the processes I had to go through to deal with it after I got through it for the family. For some reason, being there and witnessing it, having to tell the family, etc., was extremely hard on me. However, I do know that personally I needed to process all of that to be okay and reflect on all the emotions I felt with it.
I will always be proud to be a nurse, and I am even grateful that it happened to me and I was the one that had to handle it and was able to be there for the family. I do not think I could be more proud to be a nurse and I hope I never forget that what we experience and go through is not completely normal to the non medical professionals.
xoxo breezy
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